Sunday, March 30, 2014

Beginning Again

The funny thing with prayer is that sometimes the answers you pray to find come in a very unexpected way. Sometimes you end up in a place you didn't even think you would be. Again. Guess it goes to show us (again and again) that God knows our hearts better than we do and He knows what our future holds.

So, here's what I am talking about: in December Mike and I decided to take some time apart....too bad our "time apart" really wasn't separate. We still talked and when we did, we talked a lot about what went wrong with us and what we could do to fix it. The fixing part meant that both of us needed to bend more than we did before and that we had to stop trying to fit each other into an image we had in our minds of what we should be. That can be a scary thing to do. But as scary as it can be, it's exciting. It's exciting to see things in a different light and to truly appreciate him for who he is (even though some of the stuff he does annoys the heck out of me). Without all my ideals on a "perfect for me" kind of guy, I am able to enjoy him without the second guessing and the what ifs.

About three weeks before we decided to give it another go, officially, I had four people tell me that just because he wasn't the strong spiritual family leader I had envisioned being with, to not discredit him. People change and grow and maybe he needed/wanted my support and encouragement to help him in his journey to having a relationship with Jesus. That whole statement just kinda floored me. The people who told me this are all people I admire, faith wise, and all people that I respect. Point taken, God. So, with that thought in my head and in my prayers, Mike and I started having the types of conversations we should have had in September before we started dating. It is so amazing when you have these light bulb moments and you have someone sharing them with you! In our many conversations, I learned a lot about him that I didn't know. Many times I have been pleasantly surprised to find out things about him that I had hoped to find in all areas, but mainly faith and family.

 I am not perfect, he is not perfect....but we both laid aside our ideals and differences and have created a relationship that is built on honesty, trust, open communication, quite a bit of silliness, and faith. I could go on and on about how he is so different than other guys but I won't. But he is pretty terrific and I love what we have together. I know that there are many people who don't get this or us and that's fine. It's not their life to live, it's ours. Second chances are a wonderful thing!